Monday, July 18, 2011

Something off My Chest

     Most of the people that see me, whether friends, people at the store, or even some family have no idea what has to be done on a daily basis to try to maintain or prolong any decrease in my health. When someone looks at me they have no idea that 9 times out of 10 I'm running on half the lungs they are and that my body is fighting off infections all the time.
     Although I am happy to say I don't "look sick" (as is the case for most people with CF, Bronchiectasis, and some other life threatening diseases) sometimes it makes people not believe me when I say I don't feel good or when I ask for some help because it's much harder for me to do certain things.
     The last time I was in the hospital I got upset because I feel like my dad doesn't take this serious. I cant fully blame him because I was diagnosed with CF at 12 and wasn't hospitalized till I was 20 and at that time I was already living on my own. He never got to see all the struggles that most CF parents do. Now with my lung function at 44% and being scared I thaught that he would have been there for me. I know that I am an adult and that he has other things to worry about including my 7 year old brother but I am his daughter. Even though he did come to visit me a few times he doesn't really focus on me and when I talk I feel like I'm talking to a brick wall. I am not over the situation completely cause sometimes I feel like he doesn't really care. It's hard to discuss with him cause he's always "so busy".
     Now that I got to vent, Dad if you read this sorry but hopefully you will understand how I feel.

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